The rather unremarkable demise of Red
I’ve put off this post for quite a while. As the title indicates Red and I didn’t work out. Actually we both still work out but us dating didn’t work.
She had originally asked me out when I felt another relationship was sailing towards the rocks. In case you have forgotten I also have a penis and she is hot. So you have an angry, potenially lonely penis wielding human watching the nature of a relationship with treasured person in his world change. So of course after trying the “I’m married” bit and her not giving two fucks i agreed to coffee.
I still miss that treasured individual everyday single day and not to be a dick that isn’t even close to the case with Red. In fact the only real emotion i have when thinking about her is dread and the need to close out the story line associated with her or if she’ll be in class with me next time i practice.
So look when first approached it was and still is very flattering that she pursued me. She was as i indicated in the posts about her both very beautiful and seems to be a genuinely nice person. Her taste in men might be suspect, based on nothing else than pursuing me.
My being married didn’t matter…which made it interesting in a way. “Does your wife know you’re here” and my reply of yes of course or no she thinks i’m out smoking crack with three hookers made me a bit of a novelty. And despite all those facts we never really clicked. Or she never really clicked for me.
It happens, no big deal. No hard feelings and no broken hearts, on occasion when i see her we chat for a few seconds then go back to rolling around silently in a hot dark room with other strangers.
in fact dating Red was doomed from the start. I wasn’t sure i wanted to do anything that was pure Vanilla but said yes. See thebpenisbwileding human statement. I was not looking for a random hook up, booty call or whatever. In discussing the need to publish this post with the Sexy Little Temptress i admitted “I never want another vanilla relationship…EVER.” Of course the intent of that statement is play and romantic partners. We all need vanilla friends if for no other reason to remind us how much more fun our lives are and to watch them get drunk at parties and complain about monogamy and the lack of sex. However i digress.
So Red and I are done. We were done before we began. Not many people get let into my world, The ones that do are very few and very far between. They have to put up with the insanity that is my life, my (other) relationships, and a lot of baggage. Sometimes literal baggage like two huge suitcases.
So stopping being a sarcastic dick there were some very good things that came from this. More friends are always nice and i’d venture to say we may be friends. It not at least Red and I are nodding acquaintances.
It is nice to feel attractive and desired. She did that by showing interest and when most if not all of my (romantic and kink) relationships were very very challenged. In large part due to my own head space.
I knew but trying to do the “normal” dating thing did really help me redefine how important kink is to me. My primary relationship may not have any hint of a power exchange in it but that will be a one and only exception.
In other news our new dog does wear a collar unlike our old pup from by gone years. At kink events i can honestly say there is a creature who is both collared and wears a chest harness on a daily basis in the house.
Talk about street cred.
If another hot vanilla asks me out what will i do? Be charming, polite, and hope the “let me ask my wife, girlfriend and lover if it’s ok” bit scares them away.