Does your own personal deity care what you put in hoo ha? 1

The premise of the question does your own personal deity care what you put in your hoo ha is not meant to be gender exclusive.   I suppose it has a lot more to do with people and their own comfort or discomfort with masturbation at least on the surface.

Even if your own personal deity doesn’t care what you put in hoo ha their duly appointed representatives might.  Sexual repression is an unfortunate fact of life.  In the past the homophobic and pro gay lifestyle types clash in the media, in the different churches and in the military.  I don’t expect the world to understand or accept Poly, Swinging or BDSM beyond crude humor and TV crime show references.  It would be nice but I don’t expect the sexually repressed main stream to even try to understand  yet I’ll venture to guess that at one point or another just about everyone has known a gay person, swinger, sexual deviant, or adulterer of some form or fashion even is the puritan wasn’t aware of it.  Hell it might even be their minister or his daughter and I knew a few of those over the years.  The local elected state official or their daughter with an affinity for being spanked while wearing clothespins on her nipples. I’m just saying one might be out there wink, wink, nod, nod.

Still despite all the repression and consequences for our sexuality I like to think the world is getting better and less concerned with what is going on in our bedrooms but certainly it’s not.  I have read posts and passing comments about people are afraid they are going to be outed.  In many ways I’m in the same boat, few people have seen my face or know my birth name.  Without a doubt there are social and economic ramifications but a lot of us still write our blogs, go to outings, hit the occasional conference, and spend as much time as possible with our friends.  To not do those things would be denying part of who we are.  In the case at hand it was an acquaintance of the Chesty Blonde who had the problem.  She was not a sex positive type, not a swinger, and as sure as hell not openly kinky.  In fact there might be a picture of her  in the Universal Kinkster’s Dictionary next to the term Nilla.  She is a monogamous married mother of three.  Still someone frowned upon her sexuality, thought it best to notify the local deities representatives and it cost her a job.

What was her sin?  Did she show up topless at a family friendly event?  Nope.   Did she get caught having sex in public?  Again no.  Sex with someone other than her spouse?  Not that its anyone else’s business but no.  Strut her stuff at a pride parade?  I’m not sure she even knows what that is.  Out of all the possibilities her moral crime was inviting other married women to a sex toy party at her own home. Not a lesbo gang bang filled with girl on girl action rolling around with strap ons and biting each others pierced tits but the equivalent of the modern Tupperware party.  Really there are people in this day and age is worried about married women in their thirties buying vibrators?  Give me a fucking break no wonder your priests have issues that could be fixed by a good hooker or a copy of Hustler and a little lube.  Perhaps Rebecca was jerking me off under my desk that day in high school catholic dogma class but I sure don’t remember my religion teacher covering thou shall not put anything in thy pussy other than dick.  Trust me I’d have remembered even if it got brought up while getting a hand job.

We’ve all heard it, the history of men being afraid of women’s pleasure, all the stereo types in our culture and the stupid guidelines about what is and isn’t appropriate. Earlier today I found myself replying to a tweet and in a playful manner was going to ask “who really wants innocent anyway?”

There is nothing wrong with innocence for our youth as a matter of fact even in my house where we are very open about sex and sexuality we use tact and restraint when discussing things.  We are also radicals and teach the girls about the importance of safe sex at any age, about being careful in their relationships, with what they share as they get older, and gasp prenuptial agreements.  My hope is that we are raising kids who will be comfortable in their own skin and with their own sexuality if not in their teens certainly by the time they are in their 20’s.

I thought of doing research on what major religions teach in regards to masturbation and masturbation within a monogamous relationship.  Frankly I was afraid to since I simply can’t stand the thought of a world where millions of people are taught that such a simple and natural thing is wrong.  (Here’s a quick link if curiosity gets the better of you) I thought sex toys had become main stream and maybe they have. I thought that intelligent women who know what they like sexually and are willing to experiment and express it is exactly what the world needed more of.  And mistakenly I thought what I did on my own time in the privacy of my own home with other adults was no one else’s god damn business.

So what was the outcome?  She canceled the party but her faith based employer refused to continue her tenure on “moral grounds”.  The Blonde asked me my thoughts “maybe the NCSF” I said “or the AFL CIO” wondering aloud.  I was clueless as for where to send the woman.  No listen the Blonde told me “They told her she could still work there but only as a full time volunteer” .   So the moral of this story your own personal deity only cares what you do with your genitals if their duly appointed representatives are paying you.  I guess you can shove whatever you like in your cooter as long as you’re willing to work for free. Fucking greedy assholes.

Woman Masturbating to Playboy MagazineAnd now I return you to your regularly scheduled impure thoughts.

About Malflic

Minor Demon, life long hedonist, sadist and general nerd. Women are my weakness and greatest addiction of choice followed by torrid love affair with coffee and caffeine. When not committing sins of the flesh I’m an unrepentant capitalist, avid reader, Star Wars, and B rate comedy movie geek.

One thought on “Does your own personal deity care what you put in hoo ha?

  • Wild Child

    Well it is a good thing I plan on not working for any religious organizations. Just finished doing some organizing of my black bag. Nothing more fun than getting rid of un-used toys. Have to have room for my new ones! They are going to be a lot more fun in the near future.


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